The Price of the Path

In a few short days my boys will be heading back to school. This is such an exciting time. Both boys are starting a new grade, as they have completed the requirements that were set before them last year they are now given new skills to achieve, new responsibilities to shoulder and new expectations to meet. Had they not adequately completed what was asked of them last year they would be repeating a grade this year, thankfully this isn't the case.

In a way, I feel a lot like my boys, like I am about to start a new "grade" if you will, in my walk with the Lord. I believe that He desires to take me to a deeper level, to use me in a greater way (which are all things that I have asked Him for) however, it took growing up a bit to even be able to pray that prayer, and mean it. As I have grown and been obedient with what God has asked of me, He then began dealing with what I needed to let go of, what behaviors and thought patterns, while perhaps not sinful, were not going to take me deeper but rather hinder me from going where God wants to take me. 

It's amazing how difficult giving things up can be, it's a real fight with the flesh. And I argued, pleaded my case and felt justified. But then God simply told me, "You're right, you can hold on to those things, you can continue on that path, but it will never take you to where I want to take you, is it worth it? You decide."  Wow, when He put it that way it really shed light on how ridiculous I was being. Was I really willing to give up what God had for me for some fleshly desires? Sadly, before God shone His light on the situation, I was, but thankfully after His gentle, loving words, I am not.

What about you? Are there things that are holding you back from God's best? Your choices in entertainment, company, food or drink, reading material etc. The bible says, 

"Everything is permissible for me"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible for me"—but I will not be mastered by anything." 1 Corinthians 6:12

If we cannot give something up then we have entered the realm of being mastered by it, and the only Master we are to have is Jesus. God's plan for us is beyond our thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how great a plan it is. All we imagine is how great our plans are. We can't see the things in life that may be roadblocks to His best, unless we ask Him to shine His light on every corner in our heart and expose what, if anything, is standing between us and that path that leads to His plans. And since none of us have achieved perfection, I'm guessing there's one or two things we all can be working on.

 

I don't know about you, but I don't want to stay where I am, I want to keep progressing in the school of God, I've repeated enough grades in my life, I'm ready to get serious and hit the books. I'm ready to invest extra time and get tutoring if necessary, to ask for help, to use the tools given to me so that I can succeed, because ultimately, when God's kids succeed, God's kingdom advances and that's what it's all about. 

 

So I challenge you to count the cost, is what you're holding on to worth missing out on God's best? Only you can decide that for yourself. 

 

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." 

1 Corinthians 10:31

Is God Calling?

Last week we survived the first week of football practice. This was not something I had planned on, it wasn't even a blip on my radar just 2 months ago. However, my son showed an interest, we did some research and now he is a member of the youth football team. The first day of practice was a bit nerve-wracking for him, he had no idea what to expect, but he did have fun and wanted to go back. The second night was more fun and hard work. By the end of the week he was given all of his equipment and was placed on a team. I wasn't with him when he got his equipment but when I pulled in the driveway Thursday night there he was head to toe in his helmet, pads and uniform. Suddenly he looked like a real football player, it was a pretty crazy transformation.

God does the same thing with us. Just like my son didn't have any of the equipment he needed to play football, all he had was a desire, so it is with you and me. When God calls us to something, whether it's to lead a class, witness to a friend, sing a solo, give an offering, whatever it is, if God calls us, He equips us. All He needs is a willing person. 

My son didn't get a phone call asking him to come be a part of the youth football team because of his amazing ability to throw the football in the backyard with his dad. Nor did he get a call to play because he already owned all the equipment. No, he went to the team and said, I want to be a part of this; from there the coaches are making sure he has everything he needs to be a part of this team. And to be honest, my son didn't know a whole lot about football before last week (still doesn't, it's all a learning process), he didn't know which position he should play or the right way to block or anything.

When's the last time you asked God to be a part of His team, regardless of what that looks like?  You don't have to know which position you should be in, you don't have to own all the equipment, you don't have to know all the plays, you just have to have a desire to be a part of the team and sign up. 

Once we sign up and say, 'Ok Lord, here I am, use me', the next step is to listen and move! If my son got out on the field and then just sat there, that wouldn't make him very valuable to the team, in fact, he would then be dangerous and a hindrance to the team. But my son does whatever the coach tells him and quickly! There's no questioning the coach's direction, no wondering if it's the right thing to do, no arguing, the coach says it and the team does it. The team, each member, is confident in the coach's ability and they are trusting his expertise in the game.

We need to do the same with God. We need to go when he says go, without arguing, without waiting (delayed obedience is disobedience). We need to and have every reason to trust God's leading and direction. He will never lead us somewhere we shouldn't go, He will never ask us to do something He hasn't equipped us to do, He will never send us off on our own. 

Has God been calling you on to the field? Are you ready to make the play? The team needs you!

"You also are among those who are called..." Romans 1:6

Fuzzy Focus

All to often I feel like I haven't done much of anything with my life and that I should be striving to do something meaningful and important. I don't take into consideration my role as wife and mother when thinking about these things. I think about what my kids will be able to say that I do besides be their mom, I want it to be something great. I want my life to be significant in some grand way. I would love to sing songs that reach the multitudes, or write a best selling novel or something along those lines. I've tried to figure out how to do those things, (I've even written a book, which has yet to be desired by an agent). My quest for figuring out what I was made for beyond motherhood has left me frustrated and at times depressed. 

I have frequently pondered the question, what did God create me for? And I always throw in, "besides being a mom and wife". As much as I love those things, and really most of my childhood all I wanted was to be a mom and wife, I still feel like I was created for more, but what? After my father died my senior year in high school, all the plans that I had in my head of how my life would play out suddenly took a very different turn. I was all set to go to FSU in the fall and instead stayed home and went to UCF for a whole semester before dropping out. I have tried several times to go back to school, but with working full-time and then children, it just wasn't a priority or something I really wanted. 

So does that mean that this is it for me? At my funeral will they say, she was a great mom and wife and then end the service? If that is the case am I content with that? So many questions. So what answers do I have?

Although I may not know what my life will look like 10 years down the road or even a year down the road, I do know that right now, today, what God has set before me is to in fact, be a wife to Brian and a mom to Trevor, Nathan and Jenna. And if that's all then that's more than enough.

I don't know what my future looks like, it's a fuzzy, far-off picture that I can't clearly see, but I've been spending so much of my thought life and energy focusing on the fuzzy picture and ignoring the crystal clear view that is right in front of me. I guess it really doesn't matter what my future looks like, what I'll be doing and where I'll be doing it, because as long as I stick with God, I can be sure that it is a beautiful picture. The bible promises me that His plans for me are good.

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

So I have made a decision to live in this moment, the one I'm in right now. I'm going to be content with what God has given me and I am going to squeeze the most out of this moment. I'm not going to waste my time staring at a fuzzy picture that no matter how hard I try I can't bring into focus. I am going to keep my eyes on the Lord and day by day take what He has for me with open arms and a grateful heart. 

What about you? Are you so concerned with the future that you are missing what God has for you today? Maybe you're not concerned with what you should do with your life, maybe it's something else; finances, children, marriage, housing, ministry? In Matthew Jesus talks to us about this whole focusing on the future thing, aka worry. 

"Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life..." Matthew 6:25

That's it, plan and simple, do not worry about your life. He goes into detail about what that means and then He tells us what we should focus on,

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness..." Matthew 6:33

To seek His kingdom first is to take one day at a time and follow Him and obey Him throughout that day. Go where He leads, speak what He says, love as He loves. I guess it's much more simple than I've tried to make it. 

"Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things." Matthew 6:34

And really, what do I care what they say about me at my funeral, I won't be there anyway.  

Leaving Fear on the Sideline

My son started football practice this week. He's never played football, and being that we are not a big sports family, I dare say he's never watched a game on TV for more than a few minutes. He has played football on the Wii, but I'm pretty sure that's a bit different from the real thing. 

I sat on the sidelines yesterday watching as he listened intently to the coach and went through the drills over and over. I could hear the coach from where I was sitting and honestly, it was quite confusing to me. At one point the coach was explaining a 32 trap play, (at least I think that's what it was called) positioning kids and explaining how they were to move. I was lost. I thought for sure there was no way my son was picking up on this, I mean, there was a lot of information to assimilate in just a few short minutes. It was Trevor's turn to run the play, I watched with tense muscles, afraid he might not get it, but to my surprise he ran the play like a pro. As confused as I was sitting on the side lines he was on the field and he knew exactly what to do. 

I think it's like that in our Christian walk. We've all been there, we see someone who witnesses like it's easy as pie, or someone who gives without blinking and we think, man, I wish I could do that. Those people are on the playing field and they are running the play. Those of us who are constantly trying to wrap our brains around how to witness or give or serve, we're the ones on the sidelines, and chances are, unless we stand up and brush off our fear and doubt, we will always be on the sidelines trying to understand the play.

Trevor didn't know a thing about football 30 minutes earlier, and yet there he was, running the play as if he'd been doing this for months. And the truth is, he was scared. Just 30 minutes earlier, when they called all the 3rd and 4th graders to the coach, Trevor turned with his eyes brimming with tears and buried his face in his father's side. "I don't want to, I'm scared." He cried to his dad. My heart broke for him, I can imagine the fear of stepping out onto that field, not knowing what's going to happen, he had every right to be afraid. But my husband encouraged him and sent him on his way. As his parents, we knew he would be fine, and we were pretty sure he would actually enjoy the very thing that he was presently afraid of. 

Does that sound familiar to you? You feel prompted to witness to the cashier at the grocery store, or to give an extra $100 in the offering plate and as much as you want to, you're gripped by fear. Our Father gently encourages us, but then the choice is up to us, run on to the field or dig our heels into the sideline and refuse to move. And God knows that if we take that chance, if we run on to the field, we will love making the play, we will feel connected to the family of God, we will find the confidence to keep going and we will be a valuable member of God's winning team. However, if we choose to stay on the sidelines we will be missing out on all those things. The choice is ours, God will never force us to get off the bench.

I'm so proud of Trevor for pushing through his fear, he's an inspiration. It's time for me to push through my fears and to get off the bench and be a team player for the kingdom. I may not understand how everything works from where I sit right now, but I believe that as I step out on that field it'll all come together and I will be running the play like a pro, or at least an amateur with potential. 

"Don't fool yourself into thinking that you are a listener when you are anything but, letting the Word go in one ear and out the other. Act on what you hear!"  James 1:22 (Message)

God Understands...

When my daughter was around a year old I noticed that she wasn't using any words. I didn't think too much about it because I know that all children progress at different rates. I also try very hard to not do too much "research" and give myself too much information, which can lead to confusion and fear. I mentioned my concern at her check up and the doctor wasn't concerned. As the months passes and she still wasn't using words I became more concerned. It was clear that she was frustrated when she couldn't communicate to us and we were frustrated that we couldn't help her. I scheduled to have her evaluated and figure out how to help her. 

Her evaluation showed what I knew instinctively as a mom, she does indeed have a speech delay. We began working on teaching her sign language to give her a way to communicate and she will begin speech therapy in the fall. It's amazing to me how much she has picked up with the sign language and how much it has helped ease the stress and frustration on both her end and ours.

Do you ever feel that no one understands you? Maybe you don't even understand yourself. Perhaps you feel unheard, unnoticed, lost. Maybe you feel like you're spinning in circles trying to figure out how to communicate your dreams, desires, hopes and fears. I have felt all of these things at one time or another. At times there are things in my heart or mind that I'm not sure how to articulate, or a burden on my heart that I don't understand. 

Perhaps the greatest news is that God understands it all. He understands my daughter whether she can verbalize, sign or just scream. He understands me whether I'm poetic, witty or mute. He knows what my heart is saying even when my brain doesn't. He knows it all, He understands it all. There isn't a single secret thing in my heart that He doesn't see and know all the intricate details. He knows the painful, the joyful, the beautiful, the ugly. 

He knows that about every single one of us. There is nothing hidden from Him. There is nothing that we can say or do that will shock Him. There is no language that we can speak that He will not understand. What a relief. What an awesome God we serve, fluent in every spoken, unspoken and written language that ever was and ever will be. And He communicates right back to us, but that's a whole other subject.


So what do you have to say? What's on your heart and mind? The world may not be listening, your husband may not "get it", your friends may not have time but your Creator, your King, the Lover of your soul, He has His ear bent low and is waiting to hear from you.

"...He hears my voice." Psalm 55:17 

 

 

Slipcover Christians

A couple of months ago we were gifted my husband's grandmother's couch. The couch itself is in great shape, this woman obviously hasn't had kids in her house for quite some time. However, the fabric is, well, let's just say it's a grandma's pattern, nice and flowery. While ever so grateful for a couch to sit on, the floral print just didn't sit well with me. So yesterday, after what seemed like hours of trying to make a decision, we got a slip cover. With my sister's help, we tucked and straightened and tucked and wiggled and tucked some more until finally it was on properly. 

This is my first experience with a slip cover and if you've never had one before let me share with you some of the pros and cons. The first benefit is that you can give your couch an updated look without having to drop big bucks to either re-upholster or buy new. Two drawbacks that I have found are that slip covers are designed to go over a range of couch sizes so it won't fit exactly, which means if you look carefully you can tell that it's a slip cover. Also, whenever someone sits on the couch, the cover moves a bit and then needs to be re-tucked. Those things aside, I'm so thrilled to have the flower garden buried! 

This morning as I was laying on my "new" couch and thinking about the slip cover the Lord spoke to my heart about 'Slipcover Christians'. I thought, what the heck is that!? And as I started thinking about my slipcover it all made sense. 

How many of us try to cover up and look good when we're at church or around certain people? Trying to cover our flaws and hide our imperfections. Attempting to be someone we're not the other six days and 22 hours a week. Raising our hands and worshiping God when just 12 hours earlier we were at the bar with all our "buds" from work. Or teaching a Sunday school class while earlier in the week we were flirting with a married co-worker. Or voicing our amens during the sermon when we are harboring anger and unforgiveness toward a friend.

We've all done it at some point or another, it's human nature to try and fit it, to make yourself more than you are, and that's just the point; that's human nature and we need God nature. The more like Jesus we become, the less like us we become and that's a good thing. The only way we become more like Him is to spend time with Him. 

God doesn't want us walking around squirming in our own skin, trying to tuck away and cover up our flaws and imperfections. He wants to change us, make us new creations in Him, wash away our sins, renew our minds, cleanse our hearts, He wants us to be authentic children of God. No duplicates, no clones, no knock-off imitations, just the best version of us that He desires us to be. 

When we live our lives outside of the church walls as card carrying members of the worldly Christian club and then try to be good and fit in with the other church goers on Sunday we are completely ineffective for Christ and we are living a lie. The Word says in Revelation 3:16,

"So, because you are neither hot nor cold I am about to spit you out of my mouth."

It's time to evaluate your own life, are you trying to be a slip cover Christian and "cover-up" thoughts and behaviors that are sinful and worldly? Or are you the real deal? Would you be mortified if your pastor knew how you behaved during the week or would it line up with how you behave on Sunday? 


Let's take the slip covers off and be our true selves, flaws and all, and let's go to Jesus, the Master re-upholsterer and allow Him to make real, lasting changes in our lives. We will never regret it. 

"Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator." Colossians 3:5-10

 

Do The Work

Back in December we found out that our youngest son needed glasses. We took him in to the eye doctor and ordered his glasses. This was definitely not in our budget, but it was necessary. Then in June the unthinkable happened. Somewhere between the van and the house the glasses disappeared. I'm still not sure how in the world this happened, it's like they vanished into thin air. We spent weeks looking for the glasses. Finally I broke down and called the eye glass store to ask what our warranty covered and how much it would be to replace the glasses. I had thought when we purchased the warranty that it covered loss but I wasn't sure. (And don't ask me why I didn't call sooner, afraid of what I would hear I guess, and I was still holding out hope that we would find the glasses).

Of course we were told that they didn't cover loss and the best they could do was to give us a 15% discount. This was NOT the news I wanted. I went in and picked up the prescription and decided to just go get the cheapest glasses I could somewhere else. We even went and looked at another store to pick out glasses. My plan was with our next paycheck to order the glasses. 

Later that afternoon I was cleaning up and came across the warranty card that I was given with the glasses. I looked at the card and was shocked, right there on the top of the card, the first thing it says it covers is... loss. What!? Here we were stressing over everything when we're covered. And then the thing that really got me was the fact that the eye place didn't tell me that! I went to call the store but they were closed on Sunday and Monday (this was Sunday). I had to wait two days before getting this straightened out. 

We read the teeny-tiny print on the warranty and found that the coverage was just for the frames and there was a $15 fee. Well, that was better than nothing. This morning I called the store to tell them of my discovery. I told the gentleman that answered the phone that I was really upset that they didn't tell me the truth about my warranty and how I almost wasted money replacing the glasses. His response? He said they would order the replacement and call me when it was ready. I said, wait, does it cover everything or do I need to pay anything? He said, I don't know, we'll just give you a replacement at no charge and call you when they're ready.

Are you serious? Just like that? I'm in shock. Was it really that easy? Apparently. Then I got to thinking, how often as children of God do we just take what we're told as truth and live our lives accordingly? Possibly more often than we realize. How often does the world take what is told them as truth and go to hell because of it? Every second of every day it's happening.

Is there something that you're believing and living that isn't the truth of God? Maybe you were told that you would never amount to anything. Maybe you heard that healing was for the days of the apostles. Maybe you were told that all you had to do was live a decent life and karma would insure that you had a good afterlife. Maybe you were told that it's ok not to forgive the person who hurt you. The list goes on and on. 

The truth is we all have to research the Word of God for ourselves to find The Truth. If we live our lives based on what someone else tells us to be true we're playing a very risky game. What if they're wrong? What if you spend your entire life thinking that you're right only to find out that you were wrong. And had you spent just a little time looking into things for yourself, asking God, the only One who is qualified to judge, you would have discovered the Truth and lived your life differently. 

I'm not saying that everything you hear is wrong or that people are out there intentionally spreading lies (although some are). I am saying that we need to not be satisfied with other people's interpretation of the truth. One day we will all stand before God and have to give an answer for what we did with our lives and we won't be able to say, "well, so and so told me that living that way was ok, I didn't know." God has given us His Word to answer all of our questions and to give us the standard to live by, let's not do what I did with my son's glasses and assume that what I was told was the truth, rather, let's be proactive with our lives and spend some time researching and getting to the bottom of the Truth and reap all of the benefits that come with that knowledge. How sad for me had I just taken what I was told and then spent a bunch of money needlessly. And how much more tragic to go our entire lives not knowing the Truth.

"If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." John 8:31-32

"I am the Way, the Truth and the Life." John 14:6

 

Jesus, My Friend

I was barely 17 when my father passed away suddenly. I had just really come back into a relationship with the Lord and was devastated to think that God would allow my father to die. I remember a few weeks after his death I decided to try and go back to church. I had to at least try. I remember sitting in the pew and feeling out of place. I was alone. The music played and the congregation sang hymns. Then they started to sing, 'What a Friend We Have in Jesus'. My body tensed up, I hung my head as a parade of thoughts marched through my head.

"What kind of friend is Jesus!? He took my daddy."
"This is a joke, Jesus is no friend."
"I don't need a 'friend' like this."

One by one the thoughts marched by and moment by moment the anger and hurt grew until I could no longer stand there. I closed the hymnal, gathered my things are walked out of the church. It would be several years before I would return. 

Over the years I would occasionally hear that familiar tune and I would be instantly transported back to that small church. Each time the words becoming more of a sweet truth and less of a painful stab.

Fast forward almost 18 years. Much has changed in almost 2 decades, but Jesus hasn't. I am no longer that young, hurt, confused and angry girl. Now I am a thirty-something wife and mom desperate for more of God. But today I was reminded of that hymn.

You see, 10 months ago we made a big move across the country. It was a good move, one we'd prayed and hoped for. But it is also difficult. It is difficult to walk into new places with not a single familiar face, week after week, month after month. I've never made friends easily, and I've never had lots of them. But everyone, whether you make friends easily or not, wants to be accepted and known. 

So as I was sitting here feeling sorry for myself the Holy Spirit reminded me that I have the best friend of all, the Friend that loves me when I'm unlovable, the Friend that helps me when I am helpless, the Friend that forgives me when I don't deserve it. This Friend will never not have time for me, will never tire of my company and will never, ever forget a promise. I'm so glad that I can now sing the words of that hymn from a heart of love and gratitude, and the rest will come, I am sure of it, because my Friend gives me the desires of my heart.

"There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

What a friend we have in Jesus

all our sins and griefs to bear.

What a privilege to carry

everything to God in prayer.

Oh what peace we often forfeit;

oh what needless pain we bear.

All because we do not carry,

everything to God in prayer

Have we trials and temptations?

Is there trouble anywhere?

We should never be discouraged,

take it to the Lord in prayer.

Can we find a friend so faithful,

who with all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness,

take it to the Lord in prayer

Are we weak and heavy laden,

cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Savior still our refuge;

take it to the Lord in prayer.

Do they friends despise, forsake thee?

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

In His arms He'll take and shield thee;

thou wilt find a solace there.

Tender Sacrifice

This week we wrapped up the third and final week of VBS for our boys. All week long the boys have been learning verses and books of the bible and doing "homework" so that they can earn punches, which at the end of the week would earn them a prize. The more punches you earned the sooner you got to go to the table and pick a prize, thus giving you a better selection. Each night after VBS the boys would walk to the table and look over the prizes. They each had their eye on something special to them. Trevor had selected a huge water gun, something he's been wanting all summer. Nathan had his eye on a small stuffed animal that you can play with online. 

The final day came and at the closing program they would call names in the order of greatest to least punches. The first few names were called. Then the unthinkable happened, the little boy that Trevor had been bringing all week had his name called before Trevor. My husband and I looked at each other knowing this was most definitely a mistake. My heart beat a little faster as I wanted to jump up and say, "Hey, that's not right!" But I controlled myself, I could see Trevor getting antsy in his seat because he too knew this wasn't right. A couple more names were called and both water guns were gone. Then they finally called Trevor.

Trevor slowly walked to the table, unsure of what to do now that the one thing he had his eye on all week was gone. There was still lots to choose from, but how do you settle for second best when all you've looked at is first? Then Trevor did what most 9 year olds, or 30 year olds wouldn't, he grabbed the stuffed animal Nathan wanted. Trevor headed back to his seat and handed the stuffed dog to Nathan.

My eyes filled with tears as I was both so incredibly proud of Trevor and also heartbroken for him. All I wanted to do was run out and buy him the biggest water gun I could find. As the program finished he walked back to meet us, his head hung and eyes hidden under his baseball cap. Tears rolled down his cheeks. Sacrifice is painful. 

One definition of sacrifice says, "to surrender or give up for the sake of something else". Trevor easily could have chosen something else off that table, sure it wouldn't have been his first choice, but I'm certain there was something there that he could have enjoyed. Instead he chose to give up his right to a prize to guarantee his brother would get his first choice. 

And that's exactly what Jesus did. Jesus gave up everything, sacrificed it all, so that we could have fellowship with the Father, forgiveness of sin, eternal life and so much more. 

"For indeed Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us." 1 Corinthians 5:7

Now the question comes down to you and me, what are we sacrificing? Sometimes we sacrifice without even thinking about it, or sometimes it seems, without a choice. Middle of the night feedings, new clothes, dinners out, quiet time, these are all things that as moms and dads we give up without a thought. But what about the sacrifice that you do have a choice about? Giving something away instead of selling it to make a few dollars. Sponsoring a child. Writing a check to help a family in need. 

It is when we have to give up something in order to give it that it becomes a sacrifice. Is it much of a sacrifice if you have unlimited cash flow and you give someone $50 for groceries? Probably not. But when that $50 means the difference between a full shopping cart for you and a half empty one, well, then it really is a sacrifice. 

Do you know the secret to sacrifice? It's love. Trevor sacrificed because he loves his brother dearly. Jesus sacrificed because He loves us more than we could ever fully grasp. As mothers and fathers we sacrifice because yup, you got it, we love.  And the bible tells us that when we love God we will show it in how we treat others.

"I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethern, you did it to Me." Matthew 25:40

So let me ask you, are you giving something up for the sake of another? Or are you holding onto your comforts and rights? Have you shown your love for God in more than words? Or are you just telling Him that you love Him? I ask these things not to make you feel badly, but because I'm asking myself the same thing. God showed His love for us, He didn't just tell us He loves us. I want to do more than just tell Him. 

"By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethern. But whosoever has this world's goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth." 1 John 3:16-18

Crossroads

Have you ever stood at a crossroads in your life? Or better yet, have you ever stopped and sat down at the crossroads and pondered, prayed and sought the Lord as to what to do next. That's precisely where I feel I am at. 

About a year ago now, things began moving full tilt toward dramatic change in our family's life. A year ago we (Brian and I) began feeling in our spirit that change was inevitably coming. There was no denying it. But we had no idea what that change looked like. Now, almost a year later, we sit across the country in a new state. Nothing about what made life familiar and our "norm" is the same. But I do believe that one change was only the beginning.

As I type this my mind is filled with all the possibilities of what lies ahead of me. And I so desperately would like God to just drop me an e-mail, preferably with a video attachment of what the future looks like, according to Him. I keep checking my inbox, but there's nothing there.

So I pray. I wait. I research. I pray some more. I wait some more. I cast vision. I dream. I hope. I dare to believe. 

At this crossroads, it's a matter of believing God. Do I really believe that there's so much more for us than what we've known to be our lives? Do I really believe that He has plans to prosper us and not to harm us? Do I really believe that I am His and I know His voice? 

Yes. Yes, I do. I believe it with every fiber of my being. I choose His plans, His dreams, His road. 

Down one road is the safe, comfortable, doing what I've always done. The other road is not as safe (at least to the naked eye), it looks a bit uncomfortable and completely different from what I've done. It is that road that beckons me to come. It is that road that catches my eye and holds my gaze. It is that road that excites me and dares me to travel. 

So I'm taking the dare. I'm going for it. I am listening to my Savior, and although at times I don't hear a definitive "do this" or "do that". I am trusting that as I step He will encourage me, warn me, give me peace or unsettle me. No, I don't have to have an e-mail, although I'm always open to that! 

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference

Throw it in the Fire

Spring is in the air! Can I get a hallelujah! The snow has melted, the sun is out and the temp is rising. Having lived in Florida most of my life it's been awhile since I experienced a true spring. I must admit, I am loving this change.
 
There is one thing I don't care for so much, everything is brown, muddy and dead, but I know that life is ready to blossom just under the surface. Throughout the area there seem to be two different types of yards, those who took care and cleaned up all of the leaves when they fell in the fall and those who didn't. Ah, human nature. No one likes the work involved with fall clean up but even though the snow comes and covers it in a beautiful blanket of white it is still there and will be there when the snow melts.

I think we do this in regards to our character. We think we can ignore sin, cover it up, pretend it's not there, but sooner or later the unveiling will come and the mess is still there. Whether it's pride, greed, gossip, pick your poison, it must be dealt with. These things don't just go away on their own. 

Just like spring is a season of new life and rebirth, I believe that God is longing to breath new life into each one of us, to make us new creatures. We must leave our old ways and sinful nature in the dirt and rise to the fullness of life that He created us for. 

I am at a place in my life where I know that I just don't have time for the things that don't please and glorify God. I've already wasted too much of my life on things that do not matter in the light of eternity. I am trusting my Maker's hands as He molds and shapes me. As He reveals things in my heart that have no place there I am committed to dealing with whatever it is and not justifying or ignoring my sin.

God has called each and every one of us to such amazing things that we can't even comprehend and I am ready to yield to His plans and throw mine in the fire. 
 
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."        Jeremiah 29:11-12

It is definitely time to clean ourselves up, rake up the dead leaves, if you will, start a big fire and throw the decay away. Make room for new life to grow and blossom and see what God can do through a yielded life.

 

Scraps

I have a 14 month old - she is such a joy, but like all small children (and large) she can make quite a mess! Especially at meal times. Last night I was sitting at the table eating dinner with the 3 kids while daddy was working late. Our faithful dog, Lucy, was strategically placed right under the baby's chair, smart dog. As Jenna would do her best to get food in her mouth, inevitably food would drop to the floor where Lucy was ready to save me the trouble of cleaning the floor later. Jenna had her own food but every once in awhile she would let me know she wanted what was on my plate, even though it was the same thing, but of course I gave it to her, without hesitation.

It was then that God spoke to my heart. For far too long I have been begging for scraps under my daddy's table instead of pulling up a chair and feasting on all that He has prepared for me. Just as I freely give to my daughter, how much more does my Daddy freely give to me?

"You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows." Psalm 23:5

God has prepared a table for us. It is ready. The supper bell has rung. Yet we, the children of the Most High God, so often come running to the table and then promptly sit on the floor and beg and hope that God will throw a scrap our way. But the truth is He beckons us to come and dine with Him. To sit with Him, partake with Him and have our fill.

John 10:10 tells us that Jesus came so that we would have life MORE abundantly! This echos in my spirit daily. In each moment am I grabbing a hold of the abundant life? To dine on the fruit of God - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control. To savor the meat of His word. To satisfy my thirst with His living water. This is the abundant life. And to receive it there is no begging required. 

God has called us worthy to sit at the table with Him. Regardless of what we're wearing, what baggage we're carrying or what scars we bear, He says, come, sit, partake. And when you ask, believe that you have received! 



"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." Mark 11:24

My daughter knew that I would share my food with her (provided that it was acceptable and good for her), she didn't question and wonder if I would withhold her request. We should have the same mindset. Ask and believe.

I challenge you, I challenge myself, don't settle for scraps. Our God is a big God! There is so much more for us! We can't even begin to imagine how much more God has for us. But as long as we think we must sit on the floor and beg we will never be able to wrap our brains and hearts around the unmerited goodness of our Father. 

So are you hungry? Pull up a chair, the table is set, the feast is prepared, all that's missing is you.

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

My Olympics

It's Olympic's time, for some it's very exciting, for others it's an interruption to their favorite shows. But to the Olympiads it's everything. They have been training for years. Day after day, year after year. Early mornings, painful workouts, self-denial all for a few moments in time. All for the hope of gold on a ribbon and a place in the pages of history. 

Imagine it, you've trained for years, sacrificing, pushing yourself beyond every limit you thought you had and now it's time. You enter the arena wearing the uniform that signifies you belong to Team USA. You hear the deafening roar of the crowd. The energy and excitement is tangible. Your heart beats loud and strong in your chest, you can't help but smile as you realize, they're cheering for you. You're caught up in the moment and you let out a shout. This is it! This moment, right now, is what it was all for and it was worth it. Whatever happens at the end of the journey, whatever medal you may or may not leave with, it was all worth it, you would do it again in a heartbeat, no regrets. 

Seems like an incredible fantasy doesn't it? But I've got a secret, it's our reality. When you received Jesus as your Lord and accepted His payment for your sin on the cross you became an active, irreplaceable member of Team GOD. You are no longer clothed in shame and sin but you now wear the uniform of Team God, the robe of righteousness and the garment of praise. You have been assigned to an event, you've been given a gift, a talent, something special, a purpose only you can fulfill.

Just like the figure skater doesn't resent the skier for his abilities, neither should we resent others for their calling and gifting. Rather the skater and the skier, the athletes in general, recognize and appreciate the skill and ability in their fellow athletes. We too would be wise to not be jealous, to not be envious, rather see the God in people, see how God uses them and praise God for it! What God has placed in you is precious and highly valuable, do not despise your "event" if you will.  

And lest you get discouraged remember that you too are surrounded by multitudes rooting for you, cheering you on and believing in you. 

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." Hebrews 12:1

So what is your event? Where have you been placed to represent Team GOD? A homemaker, singer, athlete, teacher, greeter, doctor, receptionist? Your life, that's your event. No one else can fill your spot, only you have been prepared every second of your life for this moment. It's all you baby. You have everything you need, you lack nothing.

"Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed. He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 1:7-8

The Olympics last a few weeks every 4 years. But we train for a greater purpose and a greater end. This is our moment, right now, we're suited up and ready to go. The crowd cheers for us. Our coach is by our side to guide us and correct us. Our teammates run alongside of us supporting and encouraging. And our Father is waiting to welcome us across the finish line, take us in His arms and say well done.

 

To Be Held...

Have you ever agonized over a decision? I'm sure you have. Have you ever needed to do something that wasn't the easiest but was the best for your family? I'm sure you have. Have you ever been judged? I'm sure you have. 

Have you ever been ostracized?
................................... lied to?
................................... taken advantage of?

As I'm sure you have, that is exactly what I've been walking through the last 9 months. Ever since we began looking for a new job and then felt we found it we've been battling for what we believed God said is ours.  And we battled and we won. Brian got the job, we made the move, done. Let the party begin, right? Not exactly.

See, the fight was only just beginning. We never believed that this job in and of itself was the fullness of the blessings God has for us. We do believe that it was a turning point in our lives as we begin to walk in the promises and dreams, the blessings and favor that God has for us. And that is when the real battle began. 

I cannot go into details about the battle, it really doesn't matter, we all have battles, mine are no greater than yours. When you're in the battle some days you're strong, others you are miserably weak. Some days you can see the victory and then you turn a corner and are blindsided by a new attack. Some days my heart is full of faith and others my heart is just broken. 

When my surroundings begin to suffocate me, when the night brings no sleep, when my eyes are blurred with tears it is then that I must simply be held. I must hear my King tell me that He is for me, that no weapon formed against me will prosper and He is in control. He fights for me, He is my defense and if He is for me who can be against me? 

Oh how I need to be held. To feel the warmth of my Father wrapped around me like a warm blanket. To hear His heartbeat and be filled with the peace it brings. To sit and be held, to let the tears fall, with no words to speak, He knows. He knows my heart. He knows how I hurt, He knows my fears, He knows and understands my confusion. 

When I don't even know what I'm feeling, He knows. 

In the midst of this battle I won't give in. What God has for me is worth fighting for. Don't be fooled by the tears, my resolve is set. I want all that God has for me and my family and I will not give in to the taunts of the enemy. I will not listen to the jeering and lies. Rather I will lift my voice and sing to the One who has declared that vengeance is His. Through it all I will continue to praise Him. I will not be silent. And when it is necessary I will crawl up on my Savior's lap and allow Him to heal my brokenness, restore my strength, give me wisdom and ready me for war.

I am forever His and His is eternally mine.

To Embrace a Porcupine

I was watching "My Friends Tigger and Pooh" this afternoon, if you've never seen it, it's very cute. On this episode the character Porcupine had a pen pal, the pen pal wrote saying he was coming to visit and couldn't wait to give Porcupine a hug. This was a horrible thing for Porcupine because, well, being a porcupine she wasn't very huggable. Poor Porcupine tried to find a way to make herself huggable but found nothing. At last she decides that it would be better to simply not meet her pen pal rather than deal with the embarrassment of her quills. 

How many of us are just like Porcupine? We hear about Jesus and want to know Him more intimately, we want to let Him hug us, if you will, but we're too ashamed of who we are. We try to pray a little more, go to church every week, join bible studies, raise our hands in worship, you name it, if we think it'll make us more acceptable to God, we try it. But those things are not what God is looking for or at. 

"Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

You see, none of those things matter if our hearts are not right before Him. We could go to church every week and still not know the Lover of our soul. God longs for so much more than a superficial relationship with us. Those things may look good on the outside, people may think you are the greatest God-lover that ever lived, but it's what's in our heart that matters. 

At the moment what's in our hearts may be ugly, broken, dark and wounded and that's ok. God still wants our heart. You may think your heart is unrepairable, hard as a rock, impenatrable, God still wants your heart. There is no sin, no hurt, no damage beyond the grasp of our Father's merciful, healing touch. But we have to willingly surrender our hearts and give ourselves over to Him - brokenness and all. 

When Porcupine's pen pal showed up everyone was surprised, relieved and joyous to discover that he was a turtle.

You see, what Porcupine saw as a barrier between her and her dear friend turned out to really be nothing, her quills were no match for Turtle's shell. And likewise, whatever we see as a barrier between us and our Savior is truly no match for His cleansing blood and redeeming love. 

So don't run and hide, rather seek Him, go after Him with all your heart (yes, all your heart) and He will be found with open arms and you will never regret it.

 

Tear Down the Barn

I'm sure we aren't, but I certainly feel like we live in a suburb of the middle of nowhere. We aren't exactly in the heart of nowhereville but just a short drive away. The other day we were driving home and I noticed several shabby old broken down barns in people's backyards. I thought to myself, "Why in the world don't people knock those ugly things down?". I asked my husband his thoughts and he figured it's just too costly to tear them down. 

Then I thought that as Christian's we have old barns hanging out in our backyards too. Broken, unusable, unsightly... um, yeah, that would describe my past pretty well. Without Jesus I am all those things. But I have Jesus and I am no longer those things, now I am whole, usable and precious in His sight. But I have an enemy who wants me to forever be looking out at my old barn and feeling guilty and unworthy of the abundant life Jesus died to give me.

As long as I keep the old barn of my life erected I will forever look out my window and be reminded of all I was and all I did. Now don't get me wrong, we need to remember where we came from so that we don't go back there again. We must never forget all the ways that God's grace and mercy were so richly poured out on our lives. However, some people live with monuments erected to the past. Their minds are full of thoughts like, "I don't deserve God's goodness. God can't bless me, I've done too much. I should be grateful just to be going to heaven." But that's not the life that God has for us nor that He wants for us.

Tearing down the barn is costly. It will cost us everything to throw away old mindsets and grab ahold of the truth of God's Word. We will have to completely give ourselves to Christ, wholly surrendered, wholly His. No room for broken down old barns. The grace of God does not count our past against us. He does not remind us of our sin. In fact the bible says He keeps no record of it. 

So let's tear down the barns of our past and in honor of the Lord plant a beautiful garden where we sow the seeds of His promises and love and His blessings bloom daily in our lives. A garden that when people drive by they stop to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and are drawn in by the aroma of His love and they themselves desire to plant a garden like ours. A garden where there is such an abundance of goodness that all who stop can freely take as many blooms as they wish because there is no shortage of God's goodness. 

I don't know about you but I would rather a garden in my backyard over a ratty old barn any day.

Sowing and reaping His goodness....

Warning!

I was just watching the news and they had live coverage of a small, twin-engine airplane that was going in for an emergency landing. Apparently an indicator light came on that alerted the pilot that there was a problem with the landing gear. The pilot then prepared for his landing and I was able to watch the whole thing happen.

Do you know that we have indicator lights as well? We do. We get warnings that something isn't right in our marriage, with our kids, with our job, at school, with our health. The key to averting disaster is recognizing the warnings and then jumping into action dealing with what we've been warned of. 

What would have happened if the pilot ignored his warning light, just glanced at it and then kept right on doing what he was doing?  Crash and burn baby, that's what would happen. It doesn't take an air force pilot to know, ignoring the warning is NOT the right thing to do, yet as Christians so many of us do this very thing. We act as though we don't even have a clue when there are red lights and warning bells going off in every direction.

The Holy Spirit is our indicator and we'd better know His voice so that when He speaks and warns us we recognize that it's Him. The Holy Spirit will warn us that we are about to make a poor decision. He will warn us that something is going on with our child and we need to get involved. He will warn us that our marriage is in need of TLC. He will warn us and then He will instruct us as to how to deal with the warning.

The pilot of the airplane knew exactly how to handle the problem that was on his hands. There was something wrong with the landing gear and I don't know much at all about flying planes, but I'm pretty sure that those wheels are pretty darn important to getting you back on the ground in one piece! This pilot knew what to do, why? Because he had studied and prepared himself for this moment.

We are to be studying and preparing ourselves for whatever comes up in life. We study the Word of God, hide it in our hearts and then when problems arise the Holy Spirit is faithful to bring to remembrance God's instructions. Whether it be, "be slow to speak and quick to listen" or "a gentle answer turns away wrath". How about "vengeance is mine says the Lord" or "pray for your enemies". Whatever the indicator light is warning us of, God has the plan for how to land safely. But we MUST be prepared. You cannot expect the Holy Spirit to remind you of God's Word if you haven't spent any time in it. 

I was really impressed with the pilot's ability to avert disaster, how much more does God help us do the same? He gives wisdom freely and holds back no good thing from His kids. So let's start studying our flight manual and spending time with our flight instructor so we can be prepared for whatever crisis may arise.

Fasten your seat belts because it is a bumpy ride!

 

All You Need is Love

In about a week, people all over the world will be declaring their love for one another. This will be done through the giving of gifts, flowers and candy, sending cards, writing poems, dedicating songs and numerous other heartfelt displays of affection. What a great thing, to focus on someone else and make sure that they are sure of your love for them. We all love to get Valentine's, don't we? And if you're like me, you love to give Valentine's just as much if not more than receiving them. I think we should celebrate Valentine's at least once a month - I mean really, once a year is not enough.

Why do we hold back expressing our love for one another? Yet we seem to have no problem with letting our displeasure be known. Why is it so easy to let the criticism fly out of our mouths but to pay a compliment is work? And we are the worst with our own family. Those that we share our lives with are the ones that we take for granted. We all do it. 


God is working on me and hopefully with me to change my ways. I need to walk in love so much more than I do. I need to be aware of my tone of voice and the words that I speak and the wounds they inflict or the healing they provide. I am made in my Lord and Savior's image and God is love, therefore, I am to abound in love. That is how He created me. It goes against my hard wiring to operate in anything but love. Why do you think angry and bitter people are so miserable? It's because we weren't created to be that way, we were created to love. 


The Holy Spirit is correcting and training me and I want to be a good student. So, for this special month of love I am giving myself a little homework. I encourage you to do the same. Here's the assignment... 

Show an expression of love to someone once a day for the rest of February. Hopefully this will go beyond saying "I love you" when you hang up the phone. Challenge yourself, get creative and find a way to show your love. It may be putting a note in your child's backpack, it may be baking cookies for your neighbor, it may be sending an actual snail-mail letter to a friend far away or down the street. 

Let me know what you're doing and how it goes. 


I don't know about you but I want to look like and act like Jesus and He is love, so the more loving I can be the more like Him I will be. 


Now get out there and show some love!

How's Your Monitor Working? Part 2

Yesterday I posted a little about the difference between floor monitors and in-ears. How we really need to be monitoring our voices, what we say and how we say it. Here's a little more on this comparison...

Floor monitors are in general, an easy and inexpensive solution whereas in-ears are costly. Most places use floor monitors instead of in-ears for these reasons, floor monitors are common, in-ears are not. So, as a Christian are we running our lives with floor monitors or in-ears?? You be the judge. 

Floor monitor - you share with others
In-ear - it's all your own

Is your faith your own or are you grabbing a hold of someone else's revelations and wisdom? Far too many Christians rely on other people's time with God and glean off of that instead of investing their own time in fostering a relationship with the Lord. For example, do you read more books about the bible then you spend time reading the actual bible? When something comes up in your life that needs prayer, do you immediately head to your nearest prayer warrior to pray for you or do you actually pray? Is the only time you spend praising and worshiping the Lord when the worship leader of your church is in front of you leading? It's great to learn from others, it's great to glean from others, it's even greater to know your Savior personally, intimately - He's a very personal God.



Floor monitor - what you hear is not necessarily up to you 
In-ear - it's all your own

Are you running with the crowd or are you set apart for the Lord's purposes? Many fall into the trap of social pressure. This may have seemed like an issue from high school, but I think we, as adults, should recognize the signs of it in our current lives. For example, are you a slave to the latest trends, whether it be movies, books, tv, fashion etc. Do you have to go see a movie the weekend it comes out or it drives you nuts? Can you not handle missing your favorite show? Are you constantly checking the latest happenings online, facebook, twitter etc.? These things in and of themselves are not bad, what causes a problem is when we become slaves to them. Once we can no longer maintain our blood-pressure at a safe level when the thought of missing our show comes up, that could be a clue that you are no longer in control, rather society is controlling you.



Floor monitor - creates a lot of "stage noise" making it hard for others to hear 
In-ear - it's in your ear, no one else is hearing it

Are you someone who never stops talking? Do you make a lot of "noise"? Do you have to comment on everything? Or are you someone who chooses their words wisely and when you speak people listen. I, by my own admission, am a very opinionated person and am working very hard at learning to keep my mouth shut and listen to the Lord and follow His prompting as to when to speak and what to say. It's not easy. My husband on the other hand is not so much a talker, as a result, when he does speak up, people listen to him, they listen and actually hear him. The bible said it, "be slow to speak".

Floor monitor - they are ugly on stage  
In-ear - no one sees them

I think that when God sees His kids walking around chasing after the things of the world, taking the wide road and being poor examples of Jesus, He is not pleased. I believe that when we are less than what God calls us to be we are unable to be the light and glory that God designed us to be. Have you ever seen a girl/woman walking around with way too much make up on? When you see her what do you think? I'll tell you what I think, I think it's a shame that she is destroying her natural G0d-given beauty. The excess make-up covers her beauty and makes her "ugly". In an attempt to make herself beautiful she actually creates the opposite affect. As Christians, I think we, many times, do the same. In an attempt to fit in, be noticed, be special, we mar ourselves and diminish the gifts, abilities and inherent beauty God has blessed us with.



Floor monitor - less expensive  
In-ear - more expensive

^{In the book of Matthew the bible says}
  "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."  

Being a follower of Christ is not easy, it is costly. It may cost you your friends, family, job, money, dignity, pride and more. If it's not costing you anything you should re-evaluate where you're at in your walk with Christ. Knowing the Creator of the universe in a personal, intimate and real way is a rare and precious gem, in earthly terms it would be the finest diamond and we all know that diamonds are not cheap, in fact they are expensive, but what girl doesn't want a beautiful diamond on her hand? I've never heard a woman say that the diamond wasn't worth the price, and I promise that you will never say the relationship with God isn't worth the price. 


So, there's my rough and tumble comparison of the Christian life in terms of monitors. Silly I know, but that's how my brain works. I guess when it all boils down, I really don't want a floor monitor, now that I've had an in-ear, I don't want to go back. And the same could be said of intimacy with Jesus. Before I knew what it was like to talk with Him and hear from Him and know Him, I was satisfied with what everyone else told me about Him, but now that I know, I never want to rely on anyone else again.  

So what are you using in life? Floor monitors or in-ears? The choice is completely up to you.